Set fire to your hair
poke a stick
at a grizzly bear
Eat medicine
that's out of date
use your private parts
as piranha bait
Dumb ways to die
so many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to di-ie-ie
so many dumb ways to die
Get your toast out
with a fork
do your own
electrical work
Teach yourself how to fly
eat a two-week-old
un-refrigerated pie
Dumb ways to die
so many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to di-ie-ie
so many dumb ways to die
Invite a psycho
killer inside
scratch a drug dealer's
brand new ride
Take your helmet off
in outer space
use a clothes dryer
as a hiding place
Dumb ways to die
so many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to di-ie-ie
so many dumb ways to die
To keep a rattlesnake
as a pet
sell both your kidneys
on the Internet
Eat a tube
of superglue
I wonder what's
this red button do?
Dumb ways to die
so many dumb ways to die
Dumb ways to di-ie-ie-ie
so many dumb ways to die
Dress up like a moose
during hunting season
disturb a nest
full of wasps
for no good reason
Stand on the edge
of a train station platform
drive around the boom
gates at the level crossing
run across the tracks
between the platforms
They may not rhyme
but they're quite possibly
the dumbest ways to die
the dumbest ways to die
The dumbest ways
to di-ie-ie-ie
so many dumb
so many dumb ways to die
