When you come home to me
I'll wear a sweeter smile
And hope that for a while you'll
Okay
Thank you
Thank you so much
I'm climbing uphill Daddy
Climbing uphill
I'm up every morning at six
And standing in line with
two hundred girls who are
younger and thinner than me
Who have already been
to the gym
I'm waiting five hours in line
And watching the girls
just coming and going
In dresses that look
just like this
'Til my number is
finally called
When I walk in the room
There's a table of men
Always men
Usually gay
Who've been sitting like I have
And listening all day
to two hundred girls
belting as high as they can
I am a good person
I'm an attractive person
I am a talented person
Grant me grace
When you come home
I should have told them I was
sick last week they're gonna
think this is the way I sing
Why is the pianist playing
so loud
Should I sing louder
I'll sing louder
Maybe I should
stop and start over
I'm gonna stop and start over
Why is the director
staring at his crotch
Why is that man
staring at my resume
Don't stare at my resume
I made up half of my resume
Look at me stop looking at that
Look at me
No not at my shoes
Don't look at my shoes
I hate these ******* shoes
Why did I pick these shoes
Why did I pick this song
Why did I pick this career
Why does this pianist hate me
If I don't get a callback
I can go to Crate and Barrel
with mom and buy a couch
Not that I want to spend a
day with mom
But Jamie needs
space to write
Since I'm obviously such a
horrible annoying
distraction to him
What's he gonna be like
when we have kids
And once again
Why am I working so hard
These are the people who
cast Linda Blair in a musical
Jesus Christ
I suck I suck I suck I suck
When fin'lly you come home to
Okay
Thank you
Thank you so much
I will not be the girl
stuck at home in the 'burbs
With the baby the dog
and the garden of herbs
I will not be the girl
in the sensible shoes
Pushing burgers and beer nuts
and missing the clues
I will not be the girl
who gets asked how it feels
to be trotting along
at the genius's heels
I will not be the girl
who requires a man to get by
And I
