Dear Sir
I write this note to you
to tell you of me plight
For at the time of writing
I am not a pretty sight
Me body is all
black and blue
me face a deathly grey
And I write this note
to say why Murphy's
not at work today
While working
on the fourteenth floor
some bricks
I had to clear
But to toss 'em down
from such a height
was not a good idea
The foreman wasn't
very pleased
he is an awkward s**
He said I have
to cart them down
the ladders in me hod
Now shifting all those
bricks by hand
it was so very slow
So I hoisted up
a barrel and
secured the rope below
But in me haste
to do the job
I was too blind to see
That a barrel full of
building bricks
was heavier than me
And so when I
untied the rope
the barrel fell like lead
And clinging tightly
to the rope
I started up instead
I shot off like a rocket
till to my dismay
I found
That half way up
I met the b*****
barrel coming down
Now the barrel
broke me shoulder
as to the ground it sped
And when I
reached the top
I banged the pulley
with me head
I clung on tightly
numb with shock
from this almighty blow
And the barrel
spilled out half the bricks
from fourteen floors
below
Now when these
bricks had fallen
from the barrel
to the floor
I then outweighed
the barrel
and so started
down once more
Still clinging tightly
to the rope
me body racked
with pain
And half way down
I met the b***** barrel
once again
Now the force
of this collision
half way down
the office block
Caused multiple abrasions
and a nasty state of shock
Still clinging tightly
to the rope
I fell towards the ground
And I landed
on the broken bricks
the barrel had
scattered round
I lay there groaning
on the ground
I thought I'd past
the worst
But the barrel
hit the pulley wheel
and then the bottom burst
A shower of bricks
rained down on me
I didn't have a hope
As I lay there bleeding
on the ground
I let go of the b***** rope
The barrel then
grew heavier
it started down
once more
And it landed
right across me
as I lay there
on the floor
It broke three ribs
and my left arm
and I can only say
I hope you'll understand
why Murphy's
not at work today