Ahem.. Excuse me!
Can I have the attention
Of the class
For one second?
Hi kids! Do you like violence?
Wanna see me stick
Nine lnch Nails
Through each one of my eyelids?
Wanna copy me and do
Exactly like I did?
Try acid and get fxxked up
Worse that my life is?
My brain's dead weight
I'm tryin to get
My head straight
But I can't figure out
Which Spice Girl
I want to impregnate
And Dr. Dre said......
Uh-uhhh!
Well since age twelve
I've felt like I'm someone else
Cause I hung my original self
From the top bunk with a belt
Got pissed off and ripped
Pamela Lee's txts off
And smacked her so hard
I knocked her clothes backwards
Like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of grass
And fall on my ass
Faster than a fat bxtch
Who sat down too fast
C'mere slut!
I don't give a fxxk
God sent me
To piss the world off!
My English teacher wanted
To flunk me in junior high
Thanks alot
Next semester, I'll be 35
I smacked him in his face
With an eraser
Chased him with a stapler
And stapled his nuts
To a stack of paper
Walked in a strip club
Had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender
Then stuck my dxck
In the tip cup
Extraterrestrial
Runnin' over pedestrians
In a space ship
While they screamin at me
''LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!''
Ninety-nine percent of my life
I was lied to
I just found out my mom
Does more dope than I do
I told her I'd grow up
To be a famous rapper
Make a record about doin drugs
And name it after her
You know you blew up
When the women rush your stands
And try to touch your hands
Like some screamin Usher fans
This guy at White Castle
Asked for my autograph
So I signed it:
'Dear Dave,
Thanks for the support
ASSHOLE!'
Stop the tape!
This kid needs to be locked away!
Dr. Dre,
Don'tjust stand there, OPERATE!
I'm not ready to leave
It's too scary to die
I'll have to be carried
Inside the cemetery
And buried alive
Am I comin or goin?
I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of vodka
Dare me to drive?
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years
My palms
Are too hairy to hide
Clothes ripped like
The lncredible Hulk
I spit when I talk
I'll fxxk anything that walks
When I was little
I used to get so hungry
I would throw fits
HOW YOU GONNA
BREAST FEED ME MOM?
YOU AIN'T GOT NO TXTS!
I lay awake and
Strap myself in the bed
Put a bulletproof vest on
And shoot myself in the head
I'm steamin mad
And by the way
When you see my dad?
Tell him that
I slit his throat
In this dream I had
Hi! My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. (who?)
My name is..
Lickatikit Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?)
My name is.. (what?)
My name is..
Lickatikit Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. (who?)
My name is..
Lickatikit Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?)
My name is.. (what?)
My name is..
Lickatikit Slim Shady