Gus is the cat at the theatre door
His name as I ought to have told you before
Is really Asparagus but that's a fuss to pronounce
That we usually call him just Gus
His coat's very shabby he's thin as a rake
And he suffers from palsy that makes his paw shake
For he was in his youth quite the smartest of cats
But no longer a terror to mice or to rats
For he isn't the cat that he was in his prime
Though his name was quite famous he says in his time
And whenever he joins his friends at their club
Which takes place at the back of the neighbouring pub
He loves to regale them if someone else pays
With anecdotes drawn from his palmiest days
For he once was a star of the highest degree
He has acted with Irving he's acted with Tree
And he likes to relate his success on the halls
Where the gallery once gave him seven cat calls
But his grandest creation as he loves to tell
Was Firefrorefiddle the fiend of the fell
