You say you got them
boots in Paris
And you're cousins
with George Jones
Drinkin's against
your religion
But that wine
is just an act
of when in Rome
You say
you're savin' yourself
for marriage
And your daddy
he's a movie star
I'm Billy Graham
honey I own this bar
Talkin' lock
stock and barrel
Hard wood floor
under neon lights
Girl if we ain't careful
We could go
to hell for lyin'
You swear
you've never been here
Ain't ever heard
no steel guitar
Well I'm George Strait
and honey I own this bar
They say tonight
it's your birthday
You just turned twenty two
You were supposed to be
hangin' with Beyoncé
But she came down with
the daggum flu
Said you were born
and raised in the city
But you're a real cowgirl
at heart
Well I'm John Wayne
and honey I own this bar
Talkin' lock
stock and barrel
Hard wood floor
under neon lights
Girl if we ain't careful
We could go to hell for lyin'
And you swear
you've never been here
That Maserati out back
is your car
Well I'm Dale Earnhardt
and honey I own this bar
We ain't ever
gonna get together
Cause you can't
BS a BS'er
You know
it's only good fun
Ain't no damage done
We're just two honky tonk
birds of a feather
Now you say
you're so mad
Cause you can't
pay your tab
Somebody
stole your credit card
Drinks are on me
I'm Braxton Keith
Honey I own this bar