Things have come to a pretty pass
Our romance is growing flat
For you like this and the other
While I go for this and that
Goodness knows what the end will be
Oh I don't know where I'm at
It looks as if we two will never be one
Something must be done
You say either and I say ''ither''
You say neither and I say ''nyther''
Either ''ither'' neither ''nyther''
Let's call the whole thing off
You like potato and I like ''potahto''
You like tomato and I like ''tomahto''
Potato ''potahto''
Tomato ''tomahto''
Let's call the whole thing off
But oh if we call the whole thing off
Then we must part
And oh if we ever part
Then that might break my heart
So if you like pajamas
And I like ''pajahmas''
I'll wear pajamas
And give up ''pajahmas''
For we know we
Need each other so we
Better call the calling-off off
Let's call the whole thing off
You say laughter and I say ''lahfter''
You say after and I say ''ahfter''
Laughter ''lahfter'' after ''ahfter''
Let's call the whole thing off
You like vanilla and I like ''vanelia''
You sasparilla and I ''sasparella''
Vanilla ''vanella''
Chocolate strawberry
Let's call the whole thing off
But oh if we call the whole thing off
Then we must part
And oh if we ever part
Then that might break my heart
So if you go for oysters
And I go for ''ersters''
I'll order oysters
And cancel the ''ersters''
For we know we
Need each other so we
Better call the calling-off off
Let's call the whole thing off
But oh if we call the whole thing off
Then we must part
And oh if we ever part
Then that might break my heart
Break my heart
So if I go for scallops
And you go for lobster
No more discussion
We both order lobster
For we know we
Need each other so we
Better call the calling-off off
Let's call the whole thing off