Blowing off
it's a gas
Blowing off
it's a trip
It's a sin
to hold it in
So let it rip
Some folk
like to hiccup
Some folk like
to cough
But me
I blow off
My birth brought
tears to my
mother's eyes
'Cos I was a wee
bit over size
You know what
goes in ain't nothin'
to what comes out
And mamma strained
and pushed and
squeezed
I simply could
not be released
The whole thing
looked like
an all in
wrestling bout
Well the midwife
tugged and the
nurses cheered
And on the
eighteenth day
My head appeared
She said hold it
right there
I'll just go
get a rope
Well I must-a heard
that 'cos my baby
rump flexed and blew
a mighty trump an'
I shot out like
a piece of soap
Yeah jet propelled
I left the room
And I farted round
like a burst balloon
Till the doctor caught
me and stuck a cork
up my derriere
When he dangled
me down I let one fly
And shot that doc
right in the eyes
Instead of crying I
sang out then
and there
Blowing off
it's a gas
Blowing off
it's a trip
It's a sin to
hold it in
So let it rip
Some folk
like to hiccup
Some folk
like to cough
But me
I blow off
Well I blew off on
my mother's knee
And I pooped my
way to puberty
And all through
school I still kept
letting 'em go
I could blow off wet
I could blow off dry
I could blow off low
I could blow off high
I could blow
off silent
so you'd
never know
And my mother said
son it would make
sense to capitalise
on your flatulence
Now maybe you
could join a band
and make us rich
So I tightened my cheeks
and I bent my knees
And found I could fart
in several keys and
what do you know
I had perfect pitch
Well I soon developed
a nice round tone
A bit like a tuba
or a bass trombone
I got amplified and
I widened my repertoire
And with a ton of sprouts
and a barrel of beans
I cracked off down
to New Orleans
An' lordy lordy
I became a star
Blowing off
Blowing off
it's a gas
Blowing off
it's a trip
It's a sin
to hold it in
So let it rip
Some folk
like to hiccup
Some folk
like to cough
But me
I blow off
