SHE COOKS WITH LARD
LOVES HOT FOOD BARS
A QUART OF SWEET TEA
AND FRIED PORK SKINS
CAN'T GET ENOUGH
EATS 'TIL SHE'S STUFFED
GOES TO THE BATHROOM
THEN SHE COMES BACK
AGAIN
SHE THINKS
SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE
MADONNA
WHEN SHE RUNS HER
GREASY FINGERS
THROUGH HER
BLEACHED BLONDE HAIR
MOST TIMES
SHE'LL PLACE ANOTHER
ORDER
AND LORDY HAVE MERCY
ON THAT LITTLE BITTY
CHAIR
SHE'S GOT A BUTT
BIGGER THAN THE BEATLES
EATIN' ME
OUT OF HOUSE
AND HOME
HER BOOTY SIZE
WELL IT OUGHT TO BE
ILLEGAL
SHE HAS A HARD TIME
SITTIN' ON THE THRONE
HAMBURGERS HOT DOGS
CHEESE FRIES
AND COLESLAW
A DOZEN BEAR CLAWS
YUM YUM YUM
LOVES SAUSAGE LINKS
HATES DIET DRINKS
TAKES UP BOTH SEATS
IN A TWO SEATER CAR
HER DOCTOR SAID
LAY OFF THE BREAD
BUT HE DIDN'T SAY
NOTHIN' 'BOUT A
SNICKER'S BAR
SHE DRINKS
SWEET MILK
BY THE GALLON
AND SHE'D NEVER
EAT A SALAD
OR A LEAN CUISINE
THEN SHE'LL LAY
SPREAD OUT
ON THE HAMMOCK
AFTER SHE'S DONE
HER DAMAGE
AT THE DAIRY QUEEN
SHE'S GOT A BUTT
BIGGER THAN THE BEATLES
FOLKS MAKE FUN
'CAUSE SHE'S
OVERGROWN
HER RUMP'S SHAPED
LIKE A VOLKSWAGEN
BEETLE
SHE GIVES NEW MEANING
TO THE WORDS
BIG BONED
BAGELS AND CREAM
CHEESE
VANILLA ICE CREAM
A TUB OF WHIPPED CREAM
YUM YUM YUM
NO YOU WON'T FIND
HER NAME
ON THE WEIGHT LOSS
OF FAME
DOWN AT JENNY CRAIG'S
WHEN SHE CLEANS
'EM OUT
AT THE WAFFLE HOUSE
THEY'LL BRING IN MORE
HAM AND EGGS
OOH OOH
SHE'S GOT A BUTT
BIGGER THAN THE BEATLES
HER FAVORITE FOOD IS
CHOCOLATE DING DONGS
IT'S WIDE ENOUGH
TO PLAY LINEBACKER
FOR THE EAGLES
DEION SANDERS
BETTER LEAVE HER ALONE
TRY CHICKEN
THAT'S BAKED
OR A FAT FREE
MILKSHAKE
ENOUGH FOR GOD SAKES
STOP THE INSANITY
WEIGHT WATCHERS
YEAH
WEIGHT WATCHERS
YEAH
YEAH I WATCHED
HER WEIGHT
I WATCHED IT GO
FROM ONE SEVENTEEN
'N A QUARTER
WHEN I MARRIED HER
TO THREE HUNDRED
SEVENTEEN 'N A HALF
TWO 'N A HALF YEARS
LATER
MOO
BUT I STILL LOVE YOU
HONEY