I HAVE A SAD STORY
TO TELL YOU
IT MAY HURT
YOUR FEELINGS A BIT
LAST NIGHT
WHEN I WALKED INTO
MY BATHROOM
I STEPPED IN
A BIG PILE OF
SHAVING CREAM
BE NICE AND CLEAN
SHAVE EVERY DAY
AND YOU'LL ALWAYS
LOOK KEEN
I THINK I'LL BREAK OFF
WITH MY GIRLFRIEND
HER ANTICS ARE QUEER
I'LL ADMIT
EACH TIME I SAY
DARLING I LOVE YOU
SHE TELLS ME THAT
I'M FULL OF
SHAVING CREAM
BE NICE AND CLEAN
SHAVE EVERY DAY
AND YOU'LL ALWAYS
LOOK KEEN
OUR BABY FELL OUT
OF THE WINDOW
YOU'D THINK
THAT HER HEAD
WOULD BE SPLIT
BUT GOOD LUCK
WAS WITH HER
THAT MORNING
SHE FELL IN A BARREL OF
SHAVING CREAM
BE NICE AND CLEAN
SHAVE EVERY DAY
AND YOU'LL ALWAYS
LOOK KEEN
AN OLD LADY
DIED IN A BATHTUB
SHE DIED
FROM A TERRIBLE FIT
IN ORDER TO
FULFILL HER WISHES
SHE WAS BURIED
IN SIX FEET OF
SHAVING CREAM
BE NICE AND CLEAN
SHAVE EVERY DAY
AND YOU'LL ALWAYS
LOOK KEEN
WHEN I WAS IN FRANCE
WITH THE ARMY
ONE DAY I LOOKED
INTO MY KIT
I THOUGHT I WOULD
FIND ME A SANDWICH
BUT THE DARN THING
WAS LOADED WITH
SHAVING CREAM
BE NICE AND CLEAN
SHAVE EVERY DAY
AND YOU'LL ALWAYS
LOOK KEEN
AND NOW FOLKS
MY STORY IS ENDED
I THINK IT IS TIME
I SHOULD QUIT
IF ANY OF YOU
FEEL OFFENDED
STICK YOUR HEAD
IN A BARREL OF
SHAVING CREAM
BE NICE AND CLEAN
SHAVE EVERY DAY
AND YOU'LL ALWAYS
LOOK KEEN